Personally, I think (as a single person) that the safest sex is NO SEX. However, this is a very creative idea.
Saturday, May 27, 2006
SAFE SEX DRESS
Personally, I think (as a single person) that the safest sex is NO SEX. However, this is a very creative idea.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
TOO MUCH TIME
This has got to be one of the cleverest
E-mails I've received in awhile.
Someone out there either has too much
spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.
(Wait till you see the last one)!
DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER
DESPERATION:When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES:!
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY
ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT
SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS NO MORE Z 'S
A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE
THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE
AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:
MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When
you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER
Yep! Someone with waaaaaaaaaaay
too much time on their hands! (Probably a son-in-law)
E-mails I've received in awhile.
Someone out there either has too much
spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.
(Wait till you see the last one)!
DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER
DESPERATION:When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES:!
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY
ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT
SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS NO MORE Z 'S
A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE
THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE
AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:
MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When
you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER
Yep! Someone with waaaaaaaaaaay
too much time on their hands! (Probably a son-in-law)
Friday, May 19, 2006
Christian One Liners
Don't let your worries get the
best of you; remember, Moses started
out as a basket case.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
until you try to sit in their pews.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The good Lord didn't create anything
without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
People are funny; they want the
front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Opportunity may knock once, but temptation
bangs on your front door forever.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Quit griping about your
church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
If the church wants a
better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God Himself does not propose
to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Some minds are like concrete
thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Peace starts with a smile.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
I don't know why some people
change churches; what difference does
it make which one you stay home from?!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
A lot of church members who
are singing "Standing on the Promises" are just sitting on the premises.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Forbidden fruits create many jams.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God grades on the cross, not the curve.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God loves everyone, but probably prefers
"fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
He who angers you, controls you!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
If God is your Copilot - swap seats!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Prayer:
Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The task ahead of us is never as
great as the Power behind us.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The Will of God never takes you to
where the Grace of God will not protect you.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
We don't change the message, the message changes us.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
You can tell how big a person
is by what it takes to..........discourage him.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The best mathematical equation I have ever seen:
1 cross + 3 nails= 4 given.
best of you; remember, Moses started
out as a basket case.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited
until you try to sit in their pews.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The good Lord didn't create anything
without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
People are funny; they want the
front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Opportunity may knock once, but temptation
bangs on your front door forever.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Quit griping about your
church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
If the church wants a
better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God Himself does not propose
to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Some minds are like concrete
thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Peace starts with a smile.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
I don't know why some people
change churches; what difference does
it make which one you stay home from?!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
A lot of church members who
are singing "Standing on the Promises" are just sitting on the premises.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Be ye fishers of men. You catch them - He'll clean them.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Don't put a question mark where God put a period.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Forbidden fruits create many jams.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God grades on the cross, not the curve.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God loves everyone, but probably prefers
"fruits of the spirit" over "religious nuts!"
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
He who angers you, controls you!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
If God is your Copilot - swap seats!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
Prayer:
Don't give God instructions -- just report for duty!
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The task ahead of us is never as
great as the Power behind us.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The Will of God never takes you to
where the Grace of God will not protect you.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
We don't change the message, the message changes us.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
You can tell how big a person
is by what it takes to..........discourage him.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The best mathematical equation I have ever seen:
1 cross + 3 nails= 4 given.
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
He Took Our Place
One day, a man went to visit a church.
He got there early, parked his car, and got out.
Another car pulled up and the driver got
out and said,"I always park there!
You took my place!" The visitor went inside for
Sunday School, found an empty seat and sat down.
A young lady from the church
approached him and stated,
"That's my seat! You took my place!"
The visitor was somewhat distressed
by this rude welcome, but said nothing.
After Sunday School, the visitor went
into the sanctuary and sat down.
Another member walked up to him and said,
"That's where I always sit! You took my place!"
The visitor was even more troubled by this
treatment, but still He said nothing.
Later as the congregation was praying
for Christ to dwell among them,
the visitor stood up, and his appearance began to change.
Horrible scars became visible on
his hands and on his sandaled feet.
Someone from the congregation
noticed him and called out, "What happened to you?"
The visitor replied, as his hat
became a crown of thorns, and a tear fell from his eye,
"I took your place."
He got there early, parked his car, and got out.
Another car pulled up and the driver got
out and said,"I always park there!
You took my place!" The visitor went inside for
Sunday School, found an empty seat and sat down.
A young lady from the church
approached him and stated,
"That's my seat! You took my place!"
The visitor was somewhat distressed
by this rude welcome, but said nothing.
After Sunday School, the visitor went
into the sanctuary and sat down.
Another member walked up to him and said,
"That's where I always sit! You took my place!"
The visitor was even more troubled by this
treatment, but still He said nothing.
Later as the congregation was praying
for Christ to dwell among them,
the visitor stood up, and his appearance began to change.
Horrible scars became visible on
his hands and on his sandaled feet.
Someone from the congregation
noticed him and called out, "What happened to you?"
The visitor replied, as his hat
became a crown of thorns, and a tear fell from his eye,
"I took your place."
Sunday, May 14, 2006
It’s Raining Pounds
No, not the sterling kind but the kind that wraps around your middle like runaway tires and hangs on your butt like gravity. All those years of eating whatever I wanted is now taking its toll. Those fat molecules that I thought were eliminated by my superior metabolism had simply bided their time all these years waiting for a weak moment to strike. Increasingly obvious is the fact that that time is here since I seem to be retaining pounds like water.
Of course my dear sister would choose this time to announce her impending marriage (yeah, yeah, yeah, hurrah, hurrah and all that) and my role as Maid of Honor. To which I take offense (not to the role but the title). I don’t need to be reminded that I am staring thirty in the eye and still single. I hear the ticking thank you very much. “Maid”, indeed.
Anyway, I’m gonna get on a strict regimen of healthy eating and exercise (yes, a diet) that will whip me into supermodel shape (Lord, I know You can work miracles) by August 06, the date of my sister’s impending nuptials. It sounds so simple doesn’t it except that I’ve never been much into sports and the only time I deny myself food is to fast (only for Jesus people). So, the coming weeks should be … umm…interesting.
Of course my dear sister would choose this time to announce her impending marriage (yeah, yeah, yeah, hurrah, hurrah and all that) and my role as Maid of Honor. To which I take offense (not to the role but the title). I don’t need to be reminded that I am staring thirty in the eye and still single. I hear the ticking thank you very much. “Maid”, indeed.
Anyway, I’m gonna get on a strict regimen of healthy eating and exercise (yes, a diet) that will whip me into supermodel shape (Lord, I know You can work miracles) by August 06, the date of my sister’s impending nuptials. It sounds so simple doesn’t it except that I’ve never been much into sports and the only time I deny myself food is to fast (only for Jesus people). So, the coming weeks should be … umm…interesting.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Be Slow to Speak
(James 1:19)
Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:
Look at the picture below. What do you see?
Horse or frog?
Monday, May 08, 2006
Christy award nominees
Christy award nominees are out. I am glad to see a couple of the books on my Must Read list nominated.
Two of them were featured by the Christian Fiction Blog Alliance (cue applause here): namely A Bride Most Begrudging by Deanne Gist and Comes A Horseman by Robert Liparulo. Also on my Must Read list is River Rising by Athol Dickson and Whence Came A Prince by Liz Curtis Higgs.
I’m not familiar with most of the other authors but then I’m just getting to know Christian fiction. However this is proof that they’re worth checking out.
Two of them were featured by the Christian Fiction Blog Alliance (cue applause here): namely A Bride Most Begrudging by Deanne Gist and Comes A Horseman by Robert Liparulo. Also on my Must Read list is River Rising by Athol Dickson and Whence Came A Prince by Liz Curtis Higgs.
I’m not familiar with most of the other authors but then I’m just getting to know Christian fiction. However this is proof that they’re worth checking out.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Trinitarian vs Oneness Doctrine
I believe that the Lord my God is one God. Explaining how the Father, Son and Holy Ghost as represented in the Bible is ONE GOD is something that has probably proven challenging for laymen and theologians alike. I have never given it much thought except to think that however you explain it the bottom line must be THAT THERE IS ONLY ONE GOD. Not “one” in terms of purpose as some may postulate but ONE IN BEING. That being said the Bible speaks about the Godhead, which we see manifested in all its forms at one time after Christ was baptized. Jesus rose from the water, the Holy Spirit descended bodily and the Father spoke from heaven. Apparently this is hard for some to accept and still hold to the ‘One God’ doctrine but personally I am of the view that it is not for me to conform God to what I can comprehend but to understand that ‘his ways are higher than my ways and his thoughts higher than my thoughts.’
Tied to this is the issue of baptism and whether to baptize in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost or in the name of Jesus. This is the question that arose and had our pastor explaining to us that we (the church) follow the apostolic doctrine and hence baptize ‘in the name of Jesus.’ I’ve never considered these issues so I decided to do some research on the internet about the subject. This brought up the Trinitarian vs Oneness issue that I was previously unaware even existed. So I am doing some reading about these issues but one thing I am sure about: there is only ONE GOD.
Tied to this is the issue of baptism and whether to baptize in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost or in the name of Jesus. This is the question that arose and had our pastor explaining to us that we (the church) follow the apostolic doctrine and hence baptize ‘in the name of Jesus.’ I’ve never considered these issues so I decided to do some research on the internet about the subject. This brought up the Trinitarian vs Oneness issue that I was previously unaware even existed. So I am doing some reading about these issues but one thing I am sure about: there is only ONE GOD.
Saturday, May 06, 2006
Research Skills Workshop (ii)
10.00 am Exchanged text messages with friend
ME: I am so sleepy. Trying hard not to fall off chair and embarrass self
FRIEND: ask lecturer lots of hard questions and she will get fed up and ask u 2 leave
ME: but then I would miss the free lunch. hmm… sleep or food? Hard decisions . . .
FRIEND: lol
ME: I am so sleepy. Trying hard not to fall off chair and embarrass self
FRIEND: ask lecturer lots of hard questions and she will get fed up and ask u 2 leave
ME: but then I would miss the free lunch. hmm… sleep or food? Hard decisions . . .
FRIEND: lol
Friday, May 05, 2006
Research Skills Workshop
Written at 1045 am
This is the 2nd day of the Basic Research Skills Workshop at the Cascadia Hotel in St. Ann’s. My eyes are crossing over and I am fighting so hard not to succumb to sleep and fall off my chair (This would be very embarrassing). Also the air conditioning is not helping at all, at all.
At 3.00 pm
Okay recovered somewhat earlier due to required interactive work but again resisting the urge to succumb to sleep (ethnic fatigue?). Hopefully it’s not long again. (Please God.)
This is the 2nd day of the Basic Research Skills Workshop at the Cascadia Hotel in St. Ann’s. My eyes are crossing over and I am fighting so hard not to succumb to sleep and fall off my chair (This would be very embarrassing). Also the air conditioning is not helping at all, at all.
At 3.00 pm
Okay recovered somewhat earlier due to required interactive work but again resisting the urge to succumb to sleep (ethnic fatigue?). Hopefully it’s not long again. (Please God.)
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
A Voice In The Wind
At 4.48 a.m. on Sunday 30 April 2006 I finally finished reading A Voice in the Wind, the first book in the Mark of the Lion Trilogy by Francine Rivera. A lot of tears were involved in the reading of this book. I think it’s my favorite Christian fiction book ever with the exception of Redeeming Love (also by Francine Rivers). One thing is certain; Ms. Rivers’ writing impacts a reader like no other that I’ve read before and with the unmistakable good news of the gospel. Hadassah’s struggle to share the fullness of the gospel with her owners is something we’ve probably all faced at one time or another. Of course, the penalty of a gruesome death was not hanging over our heads. But witnessing might have cost us friends and loved ones unable to accept the truth.
I think that that’s what impacted me greatest was the love that Hadassah showed to all. She treated everyone with a compassion and respect that was truly divine. God used her to touch a lot of lives with His love and that brought home to me that this is what He desires of us even now. If we love as Christ loves us it would be easier to forgive those that hurt us and when we see our fellow man mired in sin, our hearts would burn for the lost soul and it would be unthinkable not to share the gospel with them. I prayed that God would touch my heart so that I would have that type of love and desire to share the gospel no matter the cost to myself.
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
Web of Lies by Brandilyn Collins
The spiders that usually take up residence in the corners of my room are spindly innocent looking critters that hardly seem worth squashing, they look so harmless. That didn’t stop my heart from leaping in my throat when a strand of my own hair innocently touched my shoulders while in the shower. You got it. I thought it was a spider. What would a spider be doing in my bathroom? Absolutely nothing but I wasn’t thinking clearly at the time since I had just finished reading Brandilyn Collins’ Seatbelt Suspense, Web of Lies.So, if you’ve never harbored a fear of spiders, watch out. After reading Web Of Lies, the newest release by author Brandilyn Collins that may change.
Web of Lies, fourth and final book of the Hidden Faces series. Web of Lies brings together Brandilyn's two suspense series into one chilling and climactic story. Below is a “sneak pique” of the back cover copy of the book.
BACK COVER COPY
She was washing dishes when her world began to blur.
Chelsea Adams hitched in a breath, her skin pebbling. She knew the dreaded sign all too well. God was pushing a vision into her consciousness.
Black dots crowded her sight. She dropped a plate, heard it crack against the porcelain sink. Her fingers fumbled for the faucet. The hiss of water ceased.
God, I don't want this. Please!
A nightmarish vision. A murder in broad daylight. How are they connected?
After witnessing a shooting at a convenience store, forensic artist Annie Kingston must draw a composite of the suspect. But before she can begin, she hears that Chelsea Adams wants to meet with her-now. Chelsea Adams-the woman who made national headlines with her visions of murder. And this vision is by far the most chilling.
Chelsea and Annie soon find themselves snared in a terrifying battle against time, greed, and a deadly opponent. If they tell the police, will their story be believed? With the web of lies thickening . . . and lives at stake, who will know enough to save them?
(Excerpt from Brandilyn Collins' website)
Link to Prologue and first chapter .
"Don't forget to breathe ..."
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Sean Luke
Recently the brutal killing of six-year-old Sean Luke rocked my country. The heinous nature of his demise not to mention the cruel way in which he was assaulted prior to his death was something that was hard for anyone to take in. That two boys allegedly perpetrated these monstrous acts: one 13 and one 16 was even harder to swallow. The identities of the boys, because of their ages were never released in the press. Today however I received a picture in my e-mail that purported to be the one of the alleged offenders.
I don’t know what I was expecting but somehow I expected that a child that could conceive of such acts and perform them on another younger, more defenseless child would look somehow warped and evil and ugly. But he didn’t. And it hurt to look at that picture. I didn’t expect that but there it was: a wealth of horror, dread, pity? that startled me by its very presence and intensity. He just looked so normal. With his low-cut hair and smooth dark skin he could be my god-son in the next couple of years or any one of the Sunday school students I used to teach at one time. It was scary.
It’s for reasons like these, besides wanting to ever be with the Lord that makes my heart say ‘Come Lord Jesus come.’
I don’t know what I was expecting but somehow I expected that a child that could conceive of such acts and perform them on another younger, more defenseless child would look somehow warped and evil and ugly. But he didn’t. And it hurt to look at that picture. I didn’t expect that but there it was: a wealth of horror, dread, pity? that startled me by its very presence and intensity. He just looked so normal. With his low-cut hair and smooth dark skin he could be my god-son in the next couple of years or any one of the Sunday school students I used to teach at one time. It was scary.
It’s for reasons like these, besides wanting to ever be with the Lord that makes my heart say ‘Come Lord Jesus come.’
Saturday, April 22, 2006
SUDOKU
Okay, I confess it – deep breath –I am a puzzle freak. I tell you I absolutely love puzzles, especially crosswords. I’m not much into word finds but I also love letter-fit puzzles. How is it that I’ve only tried Sudoku today? I don’t know really but I did and now I’m hooked. So here I am trolling the Internet for some free downloads. Pathetic, probably but you probably have your own addictions. Don’t you?
Friday, April 21, 2006
The Ten Commandments, Ebonic Style
Sometimes you have to change the message's style to get it across.
Try this for some who don't understand the King James Version:
1. I'm God. Don't play me.
(I am the Lord thy God, thou shalt not have any
other gods before me.)
2. Don't be makin no hood ornaments
and charms outta me, or like me.
! (Thou shalt not have any graven images.)
3. Don't be callin' me for no reason
(Thou shalt not use the name of the
Lord thy God in vain.)
4. Y'all betta be in church on Sunday,
and not just the Sundays when
it's Mother's day, Easter
and Christmas
(Remember to keep the Sabbath day holy.)
5. Don't dis or cuss out yo momma.....
and if you know who ya daddy
is, don't dis him neither.
(Honor thy father and thy mother.)
6. no drive bys.
(Thou shalt not kill.)
7. Stick to ya own Boo.
(Thou shalt not commit adultery.)
8. Don't be borrow'n stuff and
don't give it back.
(Tho! u shalt not steal.)
9. Don't be snitchin' on the otha' man to save your behind.
(Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy brother.)
10. Don't be eyein' (skeeming) yo homie's crib, ride, woman, or nuffin.
(Thou shalt not covet anything that belongs to thy brother.)
Try this for some who don't understand the King James Version:
1. I'm God. Don't play me.
(I am the Lord thy God, thou shalt not have any
other gods before me.)
2. Don't be makin no hood ornaments
and charms outta me, or like me.
! (Thou shalt not have any graven images.)
3. Don't be callin' me for no reason
(Thou shalt not use the name of the
Lord thy God in vain.)
4. Y'all betta be in church on Sunday,
and not just the Sundays when
it's Mother's day, Easter
and Christmas
(Remember to keep the Sabbath day holy.)
5. Don't dis or cuss out yo momma.....
and if you know who ya daddy
is, don't dis him neither.
(Honor thy father and thy mother.)
6. no drive bys.
(Thou shalt not kill.)
7. Stick to ya own Boo.
(Thou shalt not commit adultery.)
8. Don't be borrow'n stuff and
don't give it back.
(Tho! u shalt not steal.)
9. Don't be snitchin' on the otha' man to save your behind.
(Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy brother.)
10. Don't be eyein' (skeeming) yo homie's crib, ride, woman, or nuffin.
(Thou shalt not covet anything that belongs to thy brother.)
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
10 Best Things to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk
10 Best Things to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk Number 1 is a favorite.
10. "They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen."
9. "This is just a 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time management course you sent me too."
8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the Whiteout. You probably got here just in time."
7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new business strategy."
6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."
5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"
4. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out how to handle that big accounting problem."
3. "Did you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?"
2. "Who put decaf in the wrong pot?!?"
And the NUMBER ONE best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk.........
1. Raise your head slowly and say, "...in Jesus name, Amen."
P.S. Almost needed this yesterday :D
10. "They told me at the Blood Bank this might happen."
9. "This is just a 15 minute power nap they raved about in the time management course you sent me too."
8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the Whiteout. You probably got here just in time."
7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new business strategy."
6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."
5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"
4. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out how to handle that big accounting problem."
3. "Did you ever notice sound coming out of these keyboards when you put your ear down real close?"
2. "Who put decaf in the wrong pot?!?"
And the NUMBER ONE best thing to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk.........
1. Raise your head slowly and say, "...in Jesus name, Amen."
P.S. Almost needed this yesterday :D
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Return from Camp
We came home from camp today. Hope to post some pictures soon. It was a really great experience. Personally I didn’t do much hiking since I really wanted rest and relaxation. The house we rented was the perfect spot for this. Set on a hill it was blanketed by rolling green grass and surrounded by the majestic mountains of the Northern Range. It was with a sense of awe that I often stood in front of the house and gazed at them feeling God’s protection and love so strongly.
The most beautiful thing that happened in camp however was our Easter Sunday worship service. It was so beautiful. There were a lot of youths that came on the trip: those that had been there before or others that had heard of the fun we’d had on the first trip and wanted to be experience it. While we’d had devotions morning and evening since arriving on Thursday yesterday morning God moved in an awesome way and a lot of the undecided and cold surrendered their all to Jesus. We’ve had altar calls before that a lot of these same youths responded to and I can’t really explain it except to say that I know that God has started something beautiful. A lot of them testified that last night that they’ve never felt God’s touch so powerfully before and some said they hadn’t had such an experience in a long time. It was a time of rebirth and revival for all. Praise the Lord!
The most beautiful thing that happened in camp however was our Easter Sunday worship service. It was so beautiful. There were a lot of youths that came on the trip: those that had been there before or others that had heard of the fun we’d had on the first trip and wanted to be experience it. While we’d had devotions morning and evening since arriving on Thursday yesterday morning God moved in an awesome way and a lot of the undecided and cold surrendered their all to Jesus. We’ve had altar calls before that a lot of these same youths responded to and I can’t really explain it except to say that I know that God has started something beautiful. A lot of them testified that last night that they’ve never felt God’s touch so powerfully before and some said they hadn’t had such an experience in a long time. It was a time of rebirth and revival for all. Praise the Lord!
Monday, April 10, 2006
God is good
Today was a good day for me. I ministered in church for the second time in about three weeks. This time my voice didn’t tremble as much and I felt more comfortable with the congregation. It may seem a strange thing to say but I had fun. I think it’s because I was comfortable enough to be myself and attempt one or two jokes (yes, successfully). The brethren were very encouraging and I really thank God for the encouragement.
Not that you asked but the message was on Luke 15: the story of the prodigal son. The emphasis however was on the importance of doing things in God’s timing. The son was not mature enough to handle his inheritance and when he received it he squandered it till he had nothing. As children of God when we go out of God’s plan and season for our lives we mess it up and can find ourselves like the younger son, in a far off country, away from our father, with nothing. So it's important to understand where God has us now and what he requires of us so we don't mess it up.
Not that you asked but the message was on Luke 15: the story of the prodigal son. The emphasis however was on the importance of doing things in God’s timing. The son was not mature enough to handle his inheritance and when he received it he squandered it till he had nothing. As children of God when we go out of God’s plan and season for our lives we mess it up and can find ourselves like the younger son, in a far off country, away from our father, with nothing. So it's important to understand where God has us now and what he requires of us so we don't mess it up.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
HOW TO TELL THE SEX OF A BIRD
This Is AMAZING!!!
Until now I never fully understood how to tell,
The difference Between Male and Female Birds.
I always thought it had to be determined surgically.
Until Now.
Which of The Two Birds Is a Female???
Below are Two Birds. Study them closely...
See If You Can Spot Which of The Two Is The Female.
It can be done.
Even by one with limited bird watching skills.
Until now I never fully understood how to tell,
The difference Between Male and Female Birds.
I always thought it had to be determined surgically.
Until Now.
Which of The Two Birds Is a Female???
Below are Two Birds. Study them closely...
See If You Can Spot Which of The Two Is The Female.
It can be done.
Even by one with limited bird watching skills.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
A Family Forever by Brenda Coulter
This month Christian Fiction Blog Tours features A Family Forever by award-winning author Brenda Coulter. If you’ve read Ms. Coulter’s award winning book Finding Hope you will have high expectations regarding this new release. Trust me, it will not disappoint.
About the book
Three weeks before her wedding Shelby Franklin finds herself pregnant and without a groom. Her fiancée has died in a tragic accident, leaving her without a father for her unborn baby.
Tucker Sharpe, her fiancée’s brother, battling his own sense of guilt over his brother’s accident proposes a marriage of convenience in order to keep a promise given in his brother’s last moments to take care of Shelby.
In spite of her unease over the fact that Tucker seems to know her better than she knows herself , Shelby agrees to the marriage for the sake of her baby.
Read more about the book here and buy the book at Amazon.com.
You won't regret it.
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